Last night I made my way back towards home. Struggled to turn the boat halfway down the wide couldn't get away from the moored boats far enough to turn into the Winding Hole. Another boat coming the other way passed on his way to the lift bridge. Anyway I finally turned round and headed to the lift bridge. On approaching the bridge the boat who had passed earlier was on the water point. His wife was dispatched to open the bridge and he hurriedly cast off and aimed his boat at the bridge, I think, trying to get through before me. This was a pointless effort because to start with he didn’t have the skill to make the turn and had to shunt back and forth. And he had to pick his wife up anyway so there was no point being in front of me. I followed him through the bridge and sailed on while he was picking up his crew.
So now I am in front of someone who seems to want to hurry. My tick-over is very slow and I just pootled down the canal as I normally do. I expected him to be right on my tail, but no he was even slower than me and didn’t come anywhere near until I was moored outside the Jolly Boatman. I pointed him to my mooring being as I wasn’t using it.
I was just surprised that he wanted to get off the water point in such a hurry. Maybe his slowness coming down from the bridge was because he realised how petty he looked bouncing off the bridge, but my shrugging shoulders would have told him that.
While I was mooring up the chap moored behind, nb Marliner, came out and asked if I would like him to move. He had left a 30/40 foot gap. What I wanted to say was, ‘Had you moored back there in the first you wouldn’t be pissing me off right now’. What I did say was, ‘no thanks I got it covered’. Polite as always.
Why do small boats take up the most room? Is it penis envy?