Wednesday, 20 October 2010

Maffi up at Oxford

How is Uni? You might well ask. And I would have to be honest and tell the truth. However, in the past telling the truth has got me banned from places so I will have to garner the truth with a few fibs. I don’t understand the exclusion practiced by the college. One of the first things I noticed around the college was the poster proclaiming that a particular political party/ideology should be STAMPED OUT! I thought this was a bit odd in a college that prides itself on its acceptance of all people from all backgrounds, classes, colours and creeds etc. Even if I was BNP I wouldn’t mention it. I think the politicos have a castration policy.

The course is, I suppose, OK. I say I suppose because so far they have been talking in Martian so I am not even sure I am in the right class. I used to speak little bits of 6 or 7 languages but unfortunately Martian wasn’t one of them. So it is taking me a bit of time to cotton on.

Take today for instance, we were discussing a poem ‘Dover Beach’ by some geezer who I think invented the Civil Service. Now I thought I had the first stanza down pat. It read to me like someone having a good shag on the beach. I couldn’t have been wronger! I am still not sure what it was about but somewhere in there Darwin appeared. Not directly, not named, but he was poking his nose in and confusing the hell out of me. “Sea of Faith” that’s what let him in. Three words and the poem turns into a struggle between traditional creation theory and Darwinism. Clear as mud!

So you can probably understand that I am confused, I mean the hardest struggle I have had of late is trying to get a pint in a pint pot. This whole concept of tearing a piece of work apart and then changing the meaning of it out of all recognition is beyond me. Ho hum!

I have a theory all the others in the class are not what they seem. They actually understand this ‘Martian’ I think, because they are not of this world. I think I am the only earthling here. I am sure I stumbled on one of them calling home this morning. “Mork calling Orson, Mork calling Orson”

7 comments:

Andrew Daykin said...

Martian - That's about right - it's about thinking outside the box - now what's in the box in the first place who knows ! Just go with the flow :) We had a Sociology tutor who decide we should read one book and do an essay by the end of the week.This book was not in the college library or to be found in Oxford at all but for one in the Bod and later we found he had one in his office ! that he refused to loan out !! What a joker - two years later he was gone.....

Captain Ahab said...

My strategy for coping with Corporate Martian is to nod sagely and say little. People assume that I know what they are talkimg about and sometime, just sometimes I finally get it - even if I disagree.

Ray Oakhill said...

Quote from some Martian Geezer, often ascribed to Dennis Thatcher, but actually by Mark Twain - "Better to keep your mouth shut and let people think you are a fool,than open it and remove all doubt!"

Maffi said...

Oh no Ray I am sure everyone already knows I am a fool, why pretend?

Ray Oakhill said...

Hey Maffi, Your reply made me laugh out loud! Listen Mate, you are nobody's fool, so don't try and kid yourself - or anyone else - eh?

Maffi said...

Oh Andrew I am so far out.side the box I cant find it

Jaqueline Almdale said...

LOL! As you well know there are intellectuals, pseudo-intellectuals, and smart folks. Intellectuals live in their minds and the world of their research or mental passion almost exclusively; pseudo intellectuals are frauds seeking to pass; the smart folk, like yourself, know when someone is passing off something in imitation of real learning and wisdom. Here's to all us martians!