Friday, 31 October 2014

Photo credit.

Sorry but I forgot to credit the speeding boat picture. A very quick thinking Lesley from aboard the nb YARWOOD snapped the offending bastards whilst out walking. She is to be commended for contacting the Hire company to appraise them of the situation.

Thursday, 30 October 2014

The proposed new ruling to keep MP’s expenses private can only mean one thing, they are all bent. If this goes ahead there will be fecking duck houses everywhere.

MP should not be allowed to have a say in this. This is one instance (one of many) where a Peoples voice committee would be the correct thing to do.

But you and I know it wont happen Our boy Dave hasn’t got the balls to make it so. Same applies to the Recall Bill.

If ever there was a festering pit of thieving vipers this government is it.

We live in a time where English MPs cannot vote on Scottish matters yet when asking for a reciprocal agreement, Scottish MPs not being allowed to vote on English matters, it has be voted down.

There seems to be only one way of stopping this viperous Government and that is to cut off its head. Sorry Dave you have to go. Don’t wait for the embarrassment of defeat, resign now!

Tuesday, 28 October 2014

Speeding liars!

This picture has been doing the rounds this year. I even wrote to the company about it. It was reported elsewhere on the net. Apparently the customers were NOT new to boating. 10711149_1100713489956246_6032780445885160502_nFunny old thing the customer did phone the company and mention that someone had been taking photographs but they didn’t know why. (Liars)

The customer was very apologetic and said, she hadn’t realised they were going so fast. To which I would ask ‘how can she tell such barefaced lies!’

The company said, “Although the stern wave is quite large, there is very little bow wave……, so I stressed the point about keeping an eye on the wave created behind the boat as they cruised along, and how the waves created will vary with the depth of water, not just the speed.”

OK so that’s that is it? Well I know its not because these lying bastards are just that. Those people on the boat knew just how fast they were going and how big the wave was behind them. I wasn’t there but I know this to be true because I have a computer and I can see. Two of the three people on the stern are looking backwards and one looks to be taking a picture!

speedIf you think they were not speeding on purpose then please let me know because you are too stupid to be on my Christmas card list!

Napton Narrowboats are a bunch of gullible fools if they believe the customer! Of course that’s just my opinion!

Monday, 27 October 2014


Ok so the latest division in the boating community is within the CCer ranks Liz and Trisha on the FB page ‘Continuous Cruisers’, have stated that you cannot be a CCer if you don’t live on your boat. This of course is preposterous twaddle and an example of the failings of our education system for many years!

They refuse to accept that if you move your boat at least every two weeks, whether or not you live on it, you are a CCer.

I cited Andrew Deny who did move as required but was told, “well that’s only one.”

My god some people are just so fecking dumb!!!

Saturday, 25 October 2014


Well I thought Alperton looked a bit scruffy so I gave it the Maffi touch. I managed to collect 19 bags of rubbish and we wont mention the steps.

Alperton.jpg Photo by Kate Saffin

Thursday, 23 October 2014


Why is simple stuff so fecking difficult. I am going to the Savoy from Brentford. Apparently I have to buy an Oyster Card or Travelcard.

As a visitor to London you have two options for tickets for the London Underground. These are Travel Cards and Oyster Cards. Read on for the benefits of each type of ticket and follow the links to purchase your tickets in advance.

I want a card for one day to travel in Zones 1,2,3,4,5. Cant be done according to the web page. Only Zones 1 & 2 have day tickets apparently.

Whatever happened to money?


This little beauty came to Thrupp this year . Its an ex-ice breaker, built I think in 1960. It was built as is and not as we usually see ice breakers. The owners had a spot of bother with the planking so decide to overplate it.

DSCF1713DSCF1715 DSCF1716DSCF1714

Monday, 20 October 2014

About Speeding

I can't help but think speeding boaters are just not understanding the problem. It doesn't matter what factors are part of the speeding problem bow design, swim length, canal width/depth di dah di dah di dah. These factors do not come into play if you are not speeding and we are still left with a group of people telling the 'whingers' to "tie up your boat properly so I can flaunt the rules and hammer along the canal like I own it".

The simple fact is that as well as tying up your boat securely being a good thing let us not forget that 'slowing down past moored boats' is one of the rules!

I know it's tedious, with moored boats all over the canal, having to slow down and speed up all the time, but it is in the rule book. The point of having a rule book is so we all sing the same song to the same tune. We can have certain expectations of how people are going to behave so that we can all do our boating in harmony.

What I do find amazing is the speeding boaters who, giving no consideration to others while on the move, shout out at me to SLOW DOWN when I have the temerity to pass them later at a my normal 'chug chug not in a hurry' speed.

I don't want to promote the rule book as a military manual, but we cannot escape the fact that people are getting hurt as a direct result of speeding boats. I have witnessed on two occasions bloodied heads appearing out of side hatches and a number of my friends have scalded themselves when their boat has unexpectedly 'heaved' as some 'holier than thou' speeder hammered past.

Yes I know the old boaters used to speed from job to job, but we don't live in those times any more and our two hundred year old canal system is becoming very fragile. What's the rush?

Sunday, 19 October 2014

New Glasses

While in Oxford last week I picked up my replacement glasses. While there I pointed out that the the previous new glasses were defective, the ‘tortoise shell’ covering on the arms was rucking up flaking off. The chap at the opticians was very concerned that I had a defective pair of glasses and ordered a new pair immediately.

As you know I am on my winter trip and told him as much. He said he would have them delivered to somewhere else. “Where will you be in a week or two.”

“Hopefully,” I said, “I will be in Paddington Basin.”

He checked on the computer for store locations and found there is one in Paddington.

Today I got a phone call from Boots opticians in Paddington, my glasses are ready.


OH Pooh!

So last week while I was in Banbury I bought some fire door rope from Tooley's. This evening I decided to clean up the door channel and install said rope In the hope that this would stop my fire burning so hot. It didn't take long to clean up the channel but now I cant find the fecking rope!


Department of Homeland Security,

Just thought I would trawl this list out again in the hope that you dont inadvertantly piss off the DHS

Below you will find a list of keywords and expressions that the Department of Homeland Security in America are searching for in your emails text messages Facebook Twitter etc. I can imagine that if every one added a part of this list to every email they send the Americans will be spinning out of control.

2600, Abu Sayyaf, Afghanistan, Agent, Agriculture, Agro, Agro Terror, Aid, Air Marshal, Airplane (and derivatives), Airport, Al Queda (all spellings), Alcohol Tobacco and Firearms (ATF), Al-Shabaab, Ammonium nitrate, AMTRAK, Anthrax, Antiviral, AQAP (Al Qaeda Arabian Peninsula), AQIM (Al Qaeda in the Islamic Maghreb), Arellano-Felix, Artistics Assassins, Assassination, Attack, Attack, Authorities, Avalanche, Avian, Bacteria, Barrio Azteca, BART, Basque Separatists, Beltran-Leyva, Biological, Biological infection (or event), Biological weapon, Black out, Blister agent, Blizzard, Body scanner, Bomb (squad or threat), Border, Border Patrol Secret Service (USSS), Botnet, Breach, Bridge, Brown out, Brush fire, Brute forcing, Burn, Burst, Bust, Cain and abel, Calderon, Canceled, Car bomb, Cartel, Cartel de Golfo, Center for Disease Control (CDC), Central Intelligence Agency (CIA), Chemical, Chemical burn, Chemical fire, Chemical Spill, Chemical weapon, China, CIKR (Critical Infrastructure & Key Resources), Ciudad Juarez, Closure, Cloud, Coast Guard (USCG), Cocaine, Collapse, Colombia, Communications infrastructure, Computer infrastructure, Conficker, Consular, Contamination, Conventional weapon, Cops, Crash, Crest, Critical infrastructure, Customs and Border Protection (CBP), Cyber attack, Cyber Command, Cyber security, Cyber terror, DDOS (dedicated denial of service), Deaths, Decapitated, Delays, Denial of service, Dirty Bomb, Dirty bomb, Disaster, Disaster assistance, Disaster management, Disaster medical assistance team (DMAT), DNDO (Domestic Nuclear Detection Office), Dock, Domestic nuclear detection, Domestic Security Domestic security, Drill, Drug, Drug Administration (FDA), Drug cartel, Drug Enforcement Agency (DEA), Drug trade, Drug war, E. Coli Earthquake, Ebola, Eco terrorism, El Paso, Electric, Emergency, Emergency Broadcast System Emergency Landing, Emergency management, Emergency response, Enriched, Environmental terrorist, Epidemic, Epidemic, Erosion, ETA (Euskadi ta Askatasuna), Evacuation, Evacuation, Execution, Exercise, Explosion (explosive), Exposure, Exposure, Extreme weather, Extremism, Facility Failure or outage, FARC (Armed Revolutionary Forces Colombia), Federal Air Marshal Service (FAMS), Federal Aviation Administration (FAA), Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI), Federal Emergency Management Agency (FEMA), First responder, Flood, Flu, Food Poisoning, Foot and Mouth (FMD), Forest fire, Fort Hancock, Fundamentalism, Fusion Center, Gang, Gangs, Gas, Grid, Gulf Cartel, Gunfight, Guzman, H1N1, H5N1, Hacker, Hail, Hamas, Hazardous, Hazardous material incident, Hazmat, Health Concern + H1N1 Help, Heroin, Hezbollah, Home grown, Homeland Defense, Homeland security, Hostage, Human to ANIMAL, Human to human, Hurricane, Ice, IED (Improvised Explosive Device), Illegal immigrants, Immigration Customs Enforcement (ICE), Improvised explosive device, Incident, Industrial spill, Infection, Infection, Influenza, Infrastructure Security Infrastructure security, Interstate, IRA (Irish Republican Army), Iran, Iraq, Islamist Jihad, Juarez, Keylogger, Kidnap, La Familia, Law enforcement, Leak, Lightening, Listeria, Lockdown, Looting, Los Zetas, Magnitude, Malware, Mara salvatrucha, Marijuana, Maritime domain awareness (MDA), MARTA, Matamoros, Meth Lab, Methamphetamine, Metro, Mexican army, Mexicles, Mexico, Michoacana, Militia, Mitigation, MS13 or MS-13, Mud slide or Mudslide, Mutation, Mysql injection, Narco banners (Spanish equivalents), Narcos, Narcotics, National Guard, National infrastructure, National laboratory, National Operations Center (NOC), National preparedness, National preparedness initiative, National security, Nationalist, NBIC (National Biosurveillance Integration Center), Nerve agent, New Federation Nigeria, Nogales, North Korea Norvo Virus, Nuclear, Nuclear, Nuclear facility, Nuclear threat, Nuevo Leon, Organized crime, Outbreak, Pakistan, Pandemic, Phishing, Phreaking, Pipe bomb, Pirates, Plague, PLF (Palestine Liberation Front), PLO (Palestine Libration Organization), Plot, Plume, Police, Pork, Port, Port Authority, Powder (white), Power, Power lines Power outage, Prevention, Public Health, Quarantine, Radiation, Radicals, Radioactive, Recall, Recovery, Recruitment, Red Cross, Relief, Resistant, Response, Reynose, Reyosa, Ricin, Riot, Rootkit, Salmonella, San Diego, Sarin, Scammers, Screening, Secure Border Initiative (SBI), Security, Service disruption, Shelter-in-place, Shooting, Shootout, Shots fired, Sick, Sinaloa, Sleet, Small Pox, Smart, Smuggling (smugglers), Snow, Social media Somalia, Sonora, Southwest, Southwest Border Violence Spammer, Spillover, Standoff, State of emergency, Storm, Strain, Stranded/Stuck, Subway, Suicide attack, Suicide bomber, Suspicious package/device, Suspicious substance, SWAT, Swine, Symptoms, Taliban, Tamaulipas, Tamiflu, Tamil Tiger, Target, Task Force, Telecommunications, Temblor, Terror, Terrorism, Threat, Tijuana, Tornado, Torreon, Toxic, Toxic, Trafficking, Transportation security, Transportation Security Administration (TSA), Tremor, Trojan, Tsunami, Tsunami Warning Center, TTP (Tehrik-i-Taliban Pakistan), Tuberculosis (TB), Tucson, Twister, Typhoon, U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services (CIS), U.S. Consulate, United Nations (UN) Vaccine, Violence, Viral Hemorrhagic Fever, Virus, Virus, Warning, Watch, Water/air borne, Wave, Weapons cache, Weapons grade, Wildfire, WMATA, World Health Organization (WHO and components), Worm, Yemen, Yuma,

Saturday, 18 October 2014

And a Hurricane

Well yesterday I made it from Caversham to Marlow. There are free moorings both above and below the lock.  Don’t mistake the paid moorings above the lock for free ones it will cost you.

It was a good day if a bit chilly. I saw the sun once for about a minute. So much for the heat wave at the end of the week.

Today I arrived in Windsor and was asked by a chap where I had come from. I couldn’t tell him. For several moments I had no recollection where I had started from.

Here at Windsor they have a monument to Sir Sydney Camm Apparently it was here last year. I was here last year (twice) and didn’t notice it.DSCF1845 DSCF1838 DSCF1839 DSCF1840  DSCF1842It points at Sir Sydney’s house which means that you cant get a very good down the gun sights shot of it..  DSCF1844

DSCF1846 It is only a replica but quite a nice one

Friday, 17 October 2014

Rough Justice

This girl was raped. Because she couldn't come up with four male witnesses to testify to the crime she was branded an adulteress and stoned to death.B0GnbpRIQAIOykw The irony, if irony is the right word here, is that one of those men could be the rapist.

There are those who want this justice here in the UK. I am sorry but I am going to have to fight against that.

Thursday, 16 October 2014


As I sit writing today it occurs to me that the Owl I am hearing is a Scops Owl. How cool is that? I bring up the owl song on the computer and open the window and the bird in the tree replies to the song on the computer. I think its getting rattled.

Thursday already!

Good ‘eavens is that the time? I have never been to Dorchester before, so this morning I set off with Molly across the fields. Kinda wish I hadn’t my hips were giving me grief when we got back.

When we cast off I noticed that the river is not as wide as it should be. In some places although the banks are far enough apart the trees reduce the distance to less than thirty feet in some places.

As you head to Shillingford there is a right hand bend outside a big posh house/hotel, as you go around the corner there is a red buoy in the middle of the river. Now when I came this way first 8 years ago I remember a tree had just fallen down. The tree has now gone but the silt bank built up behind it is still a hazard to navigation. Why do the EA not dredge this? And its not just this one instance there are several, all of which will cause the silt to build up behind it and in turn become a navigation hazard.

Every fallen tree will have an adverse effect on the water flow and when people are up to their armpits in water is not the time to try fixing it.

ACTION is need now!

Wednesday, 15 October 2014


A deaf girl from Pakistan who was kept as a slave for nine years by a millionaire couple from Salford is to receive £100,000 in compensation.

Bz_1xdzCIAA_ecf Ilyas and Tallat Ashar were jailed last October after the girl was found in their cellar in 2009. The victim was repeatedly raped and forced to work at the family's properties as a child for nine years.

Manchester Crown Court ruled the couple must also repay £42,000 of benefits falsely claimed in her name.

The Ashars must also pay £321,000 towards the cost of their trials.

Now in her 20s, the victim, who cannot be named, is believed to have been as young as 10 when she was trafficked into the UK.

Ashar cellar
The girl was found in a cellar in 2009

She was found sleeping in a cot bed in the Ashars' cellar by trading standards staff, who were investigating allegations of money laundering.

Police said the victim's details were used on bank accounts linked to the couple.

But when officers tried to speak to her at the house, they realised she was incapable of communication and moved her to a place of safety.

Police said she could not read or write, and have accepted the benefit fraud was carried out by the Ashars.


OK so what crimes can you see have been committed.
False imprisonment
Multiple Rapes
Benfit fraud
Money laundering
Fraud to name but a few.

My question is why are these monsters not deported penniless. They are not worthy of their British passports!


Why is it that…..

….whenever you forget a password and need to access your email account to reset it the is ‘down at this moment please try again later’?

Day two and three

Well I left OXFORD just after 11am on Tuesday, first putting my little tender on the roof whilst in ISIS lock. I don't want to pay for it just to tow it. It is just short of the chimney height so I knew it would make it under the rail bridge in SHEEPWASH Channel, but was uncertain about BOTLEY Bridge. Fortunately it made it.

There was no Lockie at OSNEY or IFFLEY for that matter, so I had to wait until SANFORD to pay my dues. Seven days £60! Seems cheaper than last year so I wasn’t about to argue. The Lockie, John, was a stand in I think, ex-marine. I stopped above ABINGDON Lock to empty and fill up.

What is it about wide beams? If you need that much space to live in get a fecking house. Apart from filling up dozens of bottles and containers with water, when he finished he thought I would move out so he could move off the water point straight on to the pump out while I reversed around  him to take his place on the water point. When he said this I countered “ But there are two of you”. This he hadn’t planned on and he had to call the galley slave out to help. They took so long faffing about I eventually did reverse back around him. By the time I had filled up the Lockie was off duty.

The good thing about Abingdon is Waitrose! I moored on the park side and did a shop for the next few days. Salmon, Venison, and Lamb.

This morning I went out to get stuff I forget to get last night and set off south after a chat with an elderly lady selling knitted purses in aid of Battersea Dogs home. I went down the weir stream at Culham. Just before the weir I turned around and reversed through the ‘chicane’ the rest of the way down to SUTTON COURTNEY. Lovely houses and a few nice boats. Old Working boat CHISWICK was there.

At Culham Lock the Lockie was on lunch break and some one was slowly filling the lock. A sign said it would take twenty minutes. It wasn’t wrong. When I finally got inside the lock It wasn’t until the lock was empty that the owner of the BFODB on the lock mooring decided to show his face. He made a total cock up of moving off and not waiting for me to get out of the lock first. Big boat Small brain. I come out at this time of the year to avoid the idiots, it seems they are out in force.

At CLIFTON HAMPDEN the Lockie was just about to go off to the weir, but let me down anyway. I sat on the end of the layby and made a flask and a sandwich. At DAYS Lock the Lockie looked familiar. It was John from yesterday. By the time I had got through the lock I had an invite to a BBQ next summer at the house by the motocross track above ABINGDON. It started to rain at DAYS so I moored around the corner by the outflow of the river TAME. My fire is alight, our clothes are drying and I am snug as a bug in a rug.

Monday, 13 October 2014

Sorry couldn’t resist!



Here I am, my first proper stop on my winter journey. I have arrived in Oxford. I am reluctant to go down the arm because that would mean having to reverse out with my tender on the front. I need to go out later so i will look at the mooring situation then decide if I should go down. Hardly seems worth the bother.

I see that the Mill Stream is once again filling up with Oxfords cast offs. There are 10/11 boats on the stream now as opposed to the three and a half that were there last year.  It would seem that this river and the land that forms the banks doesnt actually belong to anyone so a group of ‘boaters’ are setting up a land grab. Same just up stream of Botley/Osney Bridge.

I wouldn’t mind but this area was always a dump full of all the detritus that collects around such sites and making it not very pleasant for landies who live nearby, and just as it turns the corner and starts to become societaly friendly a new bunch of  chancers come along and feck it all up again.

Friday, 10 October 2014


I wonder if you remember this name?

In 1996 The Dunblane school massacre was one of the deadliest firearms incidents in our history, Thomas Hamilton killed sixteen children and one teacher at Dunblane Primary School near Stirling, before committing suicide.

The killings raised a public debate about our gun control laws, or lack of them. Laws were passed and we lost the right to protect ourselves from personal physical attack.

Funny old thing the laws never stopped GUN CRIME! but when the marauding hoards come to get us we will still not be in a position to fight back.


Tuesday, 7 October 2014

Liar Liar Pants on Fire

Dear Mr Leslie

Thank you for your letter dated 1st October 2014 regarding statement made by the Prime Minister, during his speech at the Conservative Party conference in Birmingham in which he said that the country “is paying down its debts”.

The latest National Statistics on Public Sector Finances, published by the Office for National Statistics on 30 September 2014, shows that public sector net debt (excluding public sector banks) as at the end of June 2010 was estimated to be £997.4 billion (equivilent to 64.0% of Gross Domestic Product) and £1432.3 billion at the end of August 2014 (79.1% of GDP), an estimated increase of £434.9 b illion over the period.


Hello Neil

Back in March I had an incident on the Stratford canal. It was at the lift bridge just above lock 2. I had placed my boat close to the lift bridge. Then laid the bow rope along the opening and down the far side and tied it off (so it would fall under the bridge when I raised it) thereby making it easier to pull through when the time came. If you know this bridge you will know it takes a lot of energy to raise it up, and a lot of energy to let it down. Well I had just started to raise the bridge when someone opened the top paddles at the lock. The movement of water caused the boat to move forward and crash into the bridge. Unfortunately this broke the stud holding the head lamp on.DSCF1727The bolt was 6mm and the stud 8mm They are both now 8 mm thanks to Neil who is a customer in the Boat Inn. He visits there once a week with his wife Julie. Having seen some of the jobs he has done for others I asked if he could do something for me, and he did. My headlamp is now fixed back on the boat in its rightful place. Neil is an all round jolly good chap.

Thank you Neil (Happy now?)

Monday, 6 October 2014

This is Shipton Lift Bridge

I wonder how long before it collapses like Caravan Bridge.DSCF1737

DSCF1738 DSCF1739 DSCF1740 DSCF1741 DSCF1742

This bridge is set open and has to be closed by the farmer. Currently it is kept open by stones on the beam. DSCF1743

Sunday, 5 October 2014

Have you ever…..

…….needed just a small amount of sealer, but found the stores only stock the large 310kg tubes, meaning you would waste most of it? Well recently I noticed that some places are stocking half size tubes which are quite expensive. Though useful they are still wasteful.

Today I found this. About the size of a small tooth paste tube. It holds only 70 g and costs only £1 from Poundland. Ideal for fixing small leaks.


Saturday, 4 October 2014

The one thing……..

…….that scares the crap out of the Taliban.


Stern deck

DSCF1386My seat tops were at best well worn. I painted the seat tops white eight years ago because I couldn’t be assed to sandpaper the varnish off when it became worn.DSCF1766

Reasonably fresh painted deck and newly varnished furniture. I had at one point thought that the seat tops were stolen but they showed up last week

DSCF1767 Side view of my tiller pin.The pin was originally a fire poker.DSCF1763Close up of tiller pin.

Friday, 3 October 2014

Alan Henning RIP

Alan Henning was murdered today by the same people who do this to Christians ……Bu7wOUsCQAEzCS1[4] …this to women…Bux8WfMCQAAYClq and this to children.BoElMDyIAAA4XYF Some fucking faith they have!

They have no humanity, no compassion, no love except that for their warring, violent, sex crazed, pedophile leader. The world doesn’t need them.

Alans wife pleading for mercy was a measure of hope where no hope existed. Her pain was what they wanted to see. They are morally bereft of  decent human behavior and the world Governments need to reconsider their continuing tenancy. This Islam is not an acceptable belief system in today’s modern world.

This of course is only my opinion. I dare say Cameron and that liberal ejit Clegg will see them as friends. While the UK burns under the banner of Islam our leaders will be fiddling (their exenses).

Thursday, 2 October 2014

This mornings passenger


Listen in………

……you cannot talk to these people. They kill hundreds of innocent people as easy as you would swat a mosquito and with less emotion.

Bu7wOUsCQAEzCS1[4] Any politician who thinks there is a diplomatic solution should be locked away.  These people understand death, nothing else. @David_Cameron lets get the gloves off and destroy these murdering bastards before they bring their evil to these shores.

Oh wait Lee Rigby!

Bureaucracy sucks!

Twenty years ago I got a mortgage to buy my first house. At the time it was the norm to have an interest only loan then carry an endowment policy to pay off the capital. So for twenty years my endowment company has taken £78 every month out of my bank account. Back in July, twenty years down the line, the policy matured. Since I took out the policy I have lived in two houses in the UK and four in the Middle East. The last UK house I lived in I sold to my daughter, which was my registered address for many years. She moved house last year. Endowment company sent a letter to this address. It was returned.

So now I want my money. I sent a new address, which happens to be Annie’s Tearoom, but they wont accept it with out proof of identity. I have argued that as they had my bank details for the last twenty years all they had to do is put my money back into my bank account. No address is needed. No not good enough.

How do we know who you are?
Does it matter?
Yes, you might not be the beneficiary.
But you took the money from my bank account!
But that doesn’t mean you are the rightful person to receive the money.
But I paid it.
That doesn’t mean you are the person to receive it.
But it was to pay off my mortgage!
We don’t know that.
What do you know?

Now at this point the operator starts talking about The DPA and protecting me from criminal activity. Well I got my first bank account in my twenties and the only times I have been subjected to criminal activity it has been carried out by the very people who are supposedly trying to protect me. So who are they to protect me from criminal activity.

What is most annoying is they have written to me at Annie’s twice now, so they are quite happy to discuss the matter with me at this address but not send the cheque.

What is it with these fecking muppets. This could have  been so simple, but they had to make it difficult.