Saturday, 28 May 2022


 ....people, how are you all doing? Me? I have left Banbury and am on my way to the Thames. Current location Wolvercote bridge!

I had a few weeks in Thrupp, when I painted and polished Milly M. When I set off from Thrupp she was looking fine. However, a trip to Yarnton Bridge and a two-day stay, left me shat on by dozens of pigeons, and all my hard work seemed wasted. I cleaned one side of the boat when I moved to Kidlington Green. I am currently at Wolvercote Bridge for a couple of days!

I have witnessed some of the work CRT has completed and also the Sustrans/Council pathway, and I must say I am impressed. I do find it hard to understand the need for Hydraulicizing the Drinkwater lift bridge. The proper solution was properly balancing the bridge. This was also the solution to the Thrupp bridge, but no one at CRT ever listens to boaters. 

However, I am now on the downside of the bridge at Wolvercote on the only mooring. Above the bridge, the new path carries on, but there is nowhere to moor. The once narrowing path is now a wide footpath which comes almost to the edge of the canal. No effort has been made to provide any kind of mooring at all. 

Well, that's fine but where do the hire boats moor to visit the pub over the bridge. Apparently nowhere! Repairs to the bank here would reduce the number of boats racing at breakneck speed to get to Thrupp, the next pub.

Come on CRT, Wolvercote has long been in need of repairs to the bank so boats could moor securely. 

I have noticed that there are no less than 6 boats moored on the offside between Kidlington and Wolvercote. One just before Langford Locks Bridge. One just above Shuttleworth Lock (Dukes Lock). Three! just above Wolvercote Lock. The sixth one escapes me just now, but I will get it.

I will stay here for a couple of days then move on to St Edwards disposal point for water.

Catch ya later! Ciao!

Tuesday, 24 May 2022


There I was having a disagreement with Susan on the back of the boat. We'd had a bottle of wine or two so I was getting louder and 'f'ier. People at the pub started to take an interest so I played to the crowd. It must have sounded awful but really it was mostly fun...........until. Up pops a camera girl with a mobile poking her nose where it wasn't wanted. I told her to go away it was nothing to do with her.

It was 10 o'clock at night. Susan wanted to take the rubbish half a mile down the towpath to the disposal. I said it could wait until the morning I didn't want to go. I needed to pee but Suze was standing in the hatchway stopping me from going in the boat. All I was saying was, get in the boat or go home, which eventually led to get in the f**king boat or go home. I said it several times getting louder and 'f' ier each time. Susan was playing, but not moving out of my way insisting we should go to the disposal. At no point was there any danger of this escalating. I was annoyed but not angry, after all, I was just about to piss me trousers.

Camera girl is told several times to f*** off. Although we are moored on the towpath she was invading my privacy, sketchy as that may have been at that time. We were in my home! I know she can take pictures anywhere she wants, but she must accept I can object to her intrusion.

So she calls the police even though she had asked Suze if she was OK and she said yes. I heard her say Susan was being held against her will and I was being violent towards her. I was not holding her against her will and if camera girl had listened she would have heard, however vocal I was, I said she was to get in the boat OR go home. By this time we were laughing together at her, though I was still angry at camera girl. Someone else called the police about the girl. When the police arrived they didn't come for me they came for her. Apparently, she is a bit of a troublemaker. They did ask us both if we were OK. I explained what was going on, and Susan explained what was going on. She explained she wasn't scared and felt no danger. The Feds were happy that there was nothing to worry about despite our little show. It was a camera girl they came for she was well known to them. 

The lady, whose birthday party it was, apologized to the pub for her behaviour. The police took the girl away from the area and sat her at the front of the pub where she tried to call for a taxi. No taxi was available, she asked the police to take her home which they did. She will undoubtedly put her vid on YouTube or FaceBook or somewhere and get her 20,000 likes and piles of sympathy. I will be treated like shit after you have all seen the vid.

Let me be honest about this, I am quite sure now, thinking back, the vid will make me look horrendous but you had to be there, in our heads, to judge.

We have decided if this should happen again I will burst into a rendition of Nessan Dorma or something similar!

required reading

Thursday, 7 April 2022

Thursday, 10 March 2022

Did you know.....

.....that when the USSR broke up NATO promised that they would not move one inch closer to Russia. After all that time it would seem that the promise was just so much hot air. Ukraine is probably the last former USSR country to want to join NATO. Now I don't agree with Putin's actions but ffs the west blatantly lied and Vladimir Putin is pissed!  

When is the west going to take responsibility for this clusterfuck?

Republics of the Soviet Union, numbered alphabetically by the English names of the post-soviet states: 1. Armenia, 2. Azerbaijan, 3. Belarus, 4. Estonia, 5. Georgia, 6. Kazakhstan, 7. Kyrgyzstan, 8. Latvia, 9. Lithuania, 10. Moldova, 11. Russia, 12. Tajikistan, 13. Turkmenistan, 14. Ukraine, 15. Uzbekistan

Wednesday, 9 March 2022


So the Milly M is now blacked and back on its home mooring. We arrived back after a short stop to collect supplies from the new LIDL store. On Our arrival on the wharf, we found these neatly laid on the boardwalk.

Monday, 28 February 2022

Beautiful English

Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis is the longest common word in the English language.

Strengths & screeched are the two longest one-syllable words in English.

Facetious, abstemious, annelidous, arsenious are English words that contain all five vowels in alphabetical order.

Uncopyrightable is the longest English word with no repeating letters.

Stewardesses is one of the longest words typeable on a normal keyboard with the left hand.

Polyphony is one of the longest words typeable on a normal keyboard with the right hand.

Quattuordecillion is a cardinal number represented in the U.S. by 1 followed by 45 zeros.

Deeded is the only word that is made using only two different letters, each used three times.

Queueing is the only word with five consecutive vowels.

The word with the most consonants in a row is latchstring.

The only words with three consecutive double letters are bookkeeping and bookkeeper.

Underground is the only word that begins and ends with "und".

If you spell out every number from 0 to 999, you will find every vowel except for "a". You have to count to one thousand to find an "a".

Q is the only letter that is not used in the name of any of the United States.

The only words with "uu" are vacuum muumuu residuum and continuum.

Subcontinental is the only word that uses each vowel only once and in reverse alphabetical order.

The longest English word without a true vowel (a, e, i, o or u) is rhythm.

More English words begin with the letter "S" than any other letter of the alphabet.

"I am." is the shortest two words sentence in the English language.

If you were to write out every number name in full (one, two, three, four...), you wouldn't use a single letter B until you reached one billion.

In written English, only one letter in every 510 is a Q.

The shortest -ology is oology, the scientific study of eggs.

11% of the entire English language is just the letter E.

Happy is used three times more often in English than Sad.

Approximately one new word is added to the English language every two hours and around 4,000 new words are added to the English dictionary every year.

Only two English words in current use end in "-gry". They are angry & hungry.

A sentence that contains all 26 letters of the alphabet is called a pangram.

The dot over the letter is called a "superscript dot".

In English, the @ symbol is usually called "the at sign" or "the at symbol".

There are only 4 English words in common use ending in "-dous" hazardous, horrendous, stupendous and tremendous.

"No." is the shortest complete sentence in the English language.

Thursday, 10 February 2022


You may remember last year we donated money from my advertising account to Trevi house, which is a women's rescue centre in Plymouth. TREVI has been a favourite charity of mine for a number of years. I have received from TREVI House, a response to our donation. Which totalled £110. This included  £70 from the ad account plus £40 from my wallet.(I have a habit of losing my wallet and if I get it back I donate half the cash therein to TREVI House. The rest of the contents of my wallet I donate elsewhere to worthy causes) However the response is currently in Oxford, but as soon as I receive it here, in Banbury, I will post it on this page.

TREVI do have a page which can be found here;

About Trevi - Trevi

If you want to donate independently of me please, by all means, do so, they need all the help they can get.

Thursday, 3 February 2022


I was going to go away for the weekend, but time was overrun by the Countess Chavagnon and her shopping/social life. We managed to get away Monday pm and I stayed at her house in Oxford for a few days. 

I started with the sniffles Monday afternoon and progressed through long bouts of sneezing on Tuesday and was comfortable again on Wednesday. So comfortable in fact that I came home on Thursday arriving in time for a late lunch. 

We persisted throughout last month with the Dry January shenanigan, an alcohol fast, that was long overdue. Low and behold we succeeded, never touched a drop! We are feeling quite chuffed and my liver had an opportunity to re-generate. My middle region also managed to do some reshaping. Some, but not much!

Milly M will be going into dry dock next month and various smaller jobs. Gas locker needs attention. One window has to come out for resealing and the internal frames need rubbing down and re-varnishing again. Ooo must get rivets!

Friday, 28 January 2022


I find it quite odd that people use the word 'blackened' to describe getting the hull done. Moreso they pay a fortune for the privilege! Having a boat blackened should be a very cheap process. One which I am able to do for next to nothing. Best quality materials to EU standards, by a qualified arsonist. £10

One liter of E10 petrol and a match. Job done.

Blackened, as you will have gathered by now, is generally the aftermath of a fire.

We take a boat to be Blacked using Blacking after which the boat has been Blacked.


Wednesday, 12 January 2022

When wearing a mask!

This is what happens when you exhale when wearing a mask. I am not going to comment, just let you see this.