There I was having a disagreement with Susan on the back of the boat. We'd had a bottle of wine or two so I was getting louder and 'f'ier. People at the pub started to take an interest so I played to the crowd. It must have sounded awful but really it was mostly fun...........until. Up pops a camera girl with a mobile poking her nose where it wasn't wanted. I told her to go away it was nothing to do with her.
It was 10 o'clock at night. Susan wanted to take the rubbish half a mile down the towpath to the disposal. I said it could wait until the morning I didn't want to go. I needed to pee but Suze was standing in the hatchway stopping me from going in the boat. All I was saying was, get in the boat or go home, which eventually led to get in the f**king boat or go home. I said it several times getting louder and 'f' ier each time. Susan was playing, but not moving out of my way insisting we should go to the disposal. At no point was there any danger of this escalating. I was annoyed but not angry, after all, I was just about to piss me trousers.
Camera girl is told several times to f*** off. Although we are moored on the towpath she was invading my privacy, sketchy as that may have been at that time. We were in my home! I know she can take pictures anywhere she wants, but she must accept I can object to her intrusion.
So she calls the police even though she had asked Suze if she was OK and she said yes. I heard her say Susan was being held against her will and I was being violent towards her. I was not holding her against her will and if camera girl had listened she would have heard, however vocal I was, I said she was to get in the boat OR go home. By this time we were laughing together at her, though I was still angry at camera girl. Someone else called the police about the girl. When the police arrived they didn't come for me they came for her. Apparently, she is a bit of a troublemaker. They did ask us both if we were OK. I explained what was going on, and Susan explained what was going on. She explained she wasn't scared and felt no danger. The Feds were happy that there was nothing to worry about despite our little show. It was a camera girl they came for she was well known to them.
The lady, whose birthday party it was, apologized to the pub for her behaviour. The police took the girl away from the area and sat her at the front of the pub where she tried to call for a taxi. No taxi was available, she asked the police to take her home which they did. She will undoubtedly put her vid on YouTube or FaceBook or somewhere and get her 20,000 likes and piles of sympathy. I will be treated like shit after you have all seen the vid.
Let me be honest about this, I am quite sure now, thinking back, the vid will make me look horrendous but you had to be there, in our heads, to judge.
We have decided if this should happen again I will burst into a rendition of Nessan Dorma or something similar!